these are mine and no one else's ( you don't have to agree or disagree, you can just actually try and relate and learn, whow, what a concept!)
well, of course I have to start with this one. I have gone into a little bit in my trans page. But this suject is fascinating to me for obvious reasons. Gender as a theoretical and reality concept has been politicized. This is exactly the reason we have the term "gender dysphoria". Politics is rooted from the Greek word meaning "powers". Politics is the construction and shifting of power. Meaning then that when i say that gender is politicized I am relating it to the democratic-capitalist construction of power. Gender has been used to control and to give rise to power. gender has become a weapon of choice for poltiicians and a modes of control for women, biological females to be more exact. Women in this country have been completly victimized politically dude to their genitalia and the assumptions and stereotypes that are linked to the "gender" WOMAN. I have experienced these things as someone who had lived a while in a female's body, by female pronouns and was perceived as a female in the outside world. Women are treated differently and most of the time as subordinates to men. And well, even as a transman I am not cool with these gender-political arrangement.
I am a die hard, hard core feminist in the most radical sense of the term. I believe in total equality as I believe in the total eradication of the division of sexual class. Thus, I believe that there is an existing sexual class. This means that your biological body, congruent with your gender expression defines what kind of work you are needed for and how you are viewed and paid for it. The division is clear when we see secretaries being mostly female and mechanics being mostly male. Feminism is an intrinsic part of my queer politics especially as a former butch lesbian. I think women need safe spaces, I think women need male allies who understand the obvious oppression that is going on within work, and family environments.
So I think anyone who knows me knows my feelings on masculinity. I think the political definition and enforcement of the construction of what is male in this society basically (in un-eloquent language formation)...sucks ass. I think it has been very dangerous for men, but most importantly for women. To be masculine one must follow a certain doctrine, a rules book is to be followed religiously if one is to become a successful male in a patriarchal capitalist pseudo-democratic (not really, more like a liberal patriarchal democracy) nation. These are the rules,
never admit real feelings, especially if ones of insecurity or shame
never admit defeat, it makes you look like you like being weak, a pansy...
always be assertive, aggressive and certain of the things you say, never doubt yourself, you will look like a fool which is totally unacceptable.
never back down from a fight (verbal/physical/challenge) especially in front of your peeps or women you may wish to be involved with later on.
always be a gentleman (this isn't one Mae complains about).
always take it like a man.
try never to apologize, thus, you admit wrong doing, men never do any wrong...or should never show the appearance of having done anything wrong.
never become a feminist (it's woman thing).
never tell your female partner your secrets between the boys.
never ever complain about anything that may make you look like a pansy (broken thumb in flag football, heartburn, cracked skull, bleeding abdomen).
don't cry, and don't laugh too much either ( you might lok like a homosexual).
and the most important rule of all, never ever let your guard down...and you must be theTOP DAWG.
These are all harmful because it prevents men from connecting with people in a meaningful way. I think meaningful is a word out of the vocabulary for many guys. I think we have to nurture each other and keep each other going, provide strength for one another in a positive way. My masculinity will always be different from most men's because I refuse to buy into the macho posturing and lame fakeness that goes along with successful manhood. If I ever have a son, I will raise him with as much power and strength as my mother had to go through life and come out alive on the ther side.